Osymyso in Dire Straits

No, no, no, I don't mean Osymyso has joined forces with Mark Knopfler. After posting my heartfelt plea for everyone to help a poor, struggling mash-up artist shift a few records, I have since discovered via Osymyso's Myspace page that things are not quite so bleak at the moment for the fella. It appears that he has been working on the soundtrack for the latest cinematic masterpiece from Simon Pegg and Edgar Wright, Hot Fuzz.

But you still need to go and buy some of his music. (And I'm looking at you, Suw Charman. Yes, Osymyso is a favourite of your beloved Simon Pegg. Mr. Pegg even performed drumming duties on the track Pandemonium from the Fruit From 50-First Batch record. So, if you don't buy any Osymyso music, dear Suw, you are effectively saying Simon Pegg is wrong. You wouldn't say such a thing, would you Suw? You don't hate Simon Pegg, do you? Prove that you don't hate Simon Pegg and buy some music by his good chum Osymyso).

No, there is no level to which I won't stoop.

Save Osymyso!

I first heard about Osymyso a few years ago through his collaborations with Chris "Brass Eye/The Day Day Today" Morris. He produced a remix of Morris' merciless re-edit of George Bush's first State Of The Union speech (which you can find at www.thesmokehammer.com) and also a video remix of the short film My Wrongs#8245-8249 & 117.

Osymyso has been described as "one of the greatest cut & paste men of contemporary times". In 1998 he created Pat 'n' Peg, a brilliant breakbeat cut-up of the Eastenders theme tune with Peggy Mitchell and Pat Butcher having a right old bitchfight over the top. It's hilarious, a work of mad genius. He has released two cut-up albums, Welcome To The Palindrome and The Art Of Flipping Channels, and in 2005 he started the "05my50" project by committing himself to write and record one new track every week during that year. This has resulted in two excellent releases (or "batches") on vinyl entitled Fruit From 50.

He has won critical acclaim from The Guardian, The Face, The New York Times and Q magazine voted him one of the Top Ten DJs You Must See Before You Die. High praise indeed.

I finally got around to buying some of his tunes when I stumbled across them at an online download store and it is all superb. Welcome To The Palindrome is an album of funky beats, squelchy synths and cut-up samples from all sorts of TV shows and movies - an obvious inspiration for the likes of The Avalanches and Too Many DJs. The first two batches from the Fruit From 50 series are superbly quirky slices of electronic music that prove that Osymyso isn't a one-trick cut-up pony. Anyone who enjoys the offbeat style of Luke Vibert (aka Wagon Christ, Plug, etc.) or Mike Paradinas (he of µ-Ziq, Jake Slazenger and Kid Spatula fame) would love Fruit From 50. And Pat 'n' Peg is just so damn funny it hurts. Brilliant stuff. This man deserves to go far.

Imagine my disbelief when I visited Osymyso's website and read the following by the man himself on the forum:

It's been a tough few months, I'm fighting to keep the whole thing going. There isn't enough work out there and people aren't buying my records so I can't afford to produce any new music. Fruit From 50 vol 3 and 4 were ready to roll but the label had to pull the release due to lack of sales on the 1st 2 volumes. The Art of Flipping Channels was the worst selling record in Antidote's history so they won't touch me with a barge pole now and despite very positive feedback from my DJ sets I can't get a booking for toffee.

This is the reality of underground music production, without a label, a manager, an agent or a press officer I am left to do it all myself and it's very difficult to get things off the ground.

If I was a band I would have split up by now but I'm just me and splitting up would be way too messy. I still believe it's worth doing even if it means I have to live exist like a peasant in a mud hut, living off berries and insects.

What?! No, no, no, this simply will not do, will not do at all. Osymyso should be in huge demand. His music is funky, funny, strange, catchy and inventive. He should be inundated with requests to remix and produce mainstream pop acts looking to acquire some credibility and cool. He should be sniffing cocaine off Lilly Allen's buttocks in a hot tub. Well, OK, maybe not that last one but, dagnabbit, Osymyso should be at the height of underground success (if that isn't too much of an oxymoron).

What can be done? Well, for a start, go to www.osymyso.com and download Pat 'n' Peg for free. Once you have stopped laughing, go to Amazon.co.uk, Juno Records or your favourite music retailer and order anything/everything they have listed. If you have no means of playing vinyl records then fear not - Fruit From 50: First Batch and Second Batch can be bought and downloaded in MP3 format from Bleep.com (simply type "Osysmyso" into the search box to find his releases).

So come on everybody. Let's pull together and show Osymyso that there are people who want his music and will pay for it. If you don't then I will get very upset, come round to your house and nail you nipples to the ceiling. Don't say I didn't warn you.